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Posts Tagged ‘Patrick Vieira’

'Eee 'Balls to you', Gareh!

::: FistedAway welcomes a guest post from Michael,
who has an ace surname and runs the splendid Regista :::
Euro-time is almost upon us. And yet, most of our attention is wrongly focused on the national teams competing at the finals, when we should be weighing up the merits of the real heroes – the broadcasters. Let’s see how the two heavyweights line up.
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New Manchester City signing Patrick Vieira has suffered a new injury setback after succumbing to a draft. It is understood that the combative midfielder aggravated the injury at home after a rug covering his knees became dislodged, which in turn caused him to spill his Horlicks.

Despite the injury, newly installed manager Roberto Mancini remains delighted at his capture and his impact on the squad in the time Vieira has had with them since joining. “It is great to have a World Cup winner in the dressing room” said Mancini. “Of course that was 1998; well, it was a different time back then. Hip Hop had just been invented by Run DMC & Jason Nevins of course, and we had street parties to celebrate – with people dressed up as B-boys and impromptu MC battles. Patrick was instrumental in landing France the inaugural World Cup, which, lets not forget, was only brought about after the League of Nations failed. He still possess those qualities which helped him win his midfield battle against the great Caetano Veloso of Brazil”.

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(As imagined by Mark from Sport without Spin)

Alright wimps,

I’m Roy Keane. Great player, great manager. Not everyone is like me. Some people, like Ipswich players and those of a moderate temper, don’t understand what it is to live life without compromises. Feckwits, the lot of them. Philanthropist that I am, I’m going to take a little time out of my dog walking schedule to clear up the dog messes that are your lives. Before I do that, let me be clear – you should sort them out yourselves, you lazy, coddled, tossers. Since you can’t, though, I’m going to go box-to-box over the postbag…

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