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Posts Tagged ‘BBC’

A BBC insider has revealed the lengths the corporation has gone to entrap the Match of the Day team- into uttering something so heinous that they have an excuse to sack them immediately.

The Match of the Day team are known to have long-term contracts with a variety of cast-iron clauses preventing them from being moved on for otherwise career-ending misdemeanours, including traffic offences, affairs, comparing a tackle to rape or not knowing anything about Hatem Ben Arfa.

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'Eee 'Balls to you', Gareh!

::: FistedAway welcomes a guest post from Michael,
who has an ace surname and runs the splendid Regista :::
Euro-time is almost upon us. And yet, most of our attention is wrongly focused on the national teams competing at the finals, when we should be weighing up the merits of the real heroes – the broadcasters. Let’s see how the two heavyweights line up.
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MOTD pundits

Television bosses are considering a root and branch redevelopment of British punditry, amid claims that imported stars, such as Clarence Seedorf and David Ginola, are harming the prospects of young English pundits.

The move comes in the aftermath of the Match of the Day team’s poor showing at the World Cup. This dip in form has continued worryingly into the new season, with no sign of abating. The question of why the team performed so poorly has split experts and journalists.

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shearerpres

The excitement was palpable around television centre this morning, as excited BBC fans  welcomed back legendary pundit Alan Shearer in advance of this afternoon’s televised game between West Bromwich Albion vs Newcastle United. In advance of his triumphant return to sitting on a sofa, FistedAway spoke to the fans in a not-at-all ghoulish, exploiting-the-mentally-ill fashion.

“We’re over the moon, I can’t believe it. He knows that sofa inside out.” enthused one fan, adding “If you cut Alan, he bleeds the licence fee”.

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